Monthly Archives: October 2012

Rosenbros and Guildendude

To blog or not to blog? That was the question.  I’ve been stewing all week about whether or not I should review Rosencrantz & Guildenstern are Undead for the blog. The problem is that while the movie hits all the criteria for a “meh” film, it’s also strangely awesome. I mean, it’s stupid and yet not stupid. I didn’t know what to do!!! I wonder if this is how Prince Hamlet felt. Maybe he saw the same movie and this led to all his ravings and crazy thinking. No idea.

So, after several days of crazy talk (mostly to myself) I decided to add the movie to the blog if for no other reason than to bring it to your attention. You can view this review as either a warning or a recommendation. You make the call! It’s also on the blog because it’s Halloween, and this here’s a vampire movie.

I knew right from the beginning that Rosencrantz & Guildenstern are Undead was going to be different. From the trailer, I knew this was a about an adaptation of Hamlet and that there were vampires in it. I knew this would be a comedy. I knew that Jake Hoffman (son of Dustin) would be in it. But I didn’t know that was only the tip of the iceberg. Allow me to set the stage:

R&G opens with the following little info/disclaimer:  “Since the 1600s there have been numerous versions of Shakepeare’s Hamlet  adapted to portray vampires…..This is one of them.”   Quoi?

R&G  follows the pathetic life of Julian (played by Jake Hoffman). Julian lives in an apartment, and when I say apartment, I mean one bedroom that’s always completely trashed—kind of like Julian’s life these days. He’s an unemployed director and seems to be stuck in a kind of revolving bender of one night stands.  The trashed apartment is actually a room that’s located in Julian’s father’s medical practice. I never get the name of his father, so I’ll refer to him as Dr. Dad.

Dr. Dad’s world is kind of odd to me. First of all, his son lives in his office, which is just weird. Second, it would appear that Dr. Dad really has just one patient. He’s an Indian gent (and determined hypochondriac) with the groovy name of Hugo Pepper. Hugo and Dr. Dad seem like they fell out of a Wes Anderson movie and landed in this one. I love them!  [Special Note: I did some research. Waris Ahluwalia (who plays Hugo) has actually been in two Wed Anderson films! He was in The Life Aquatic and The Darjeeling Limited. Small world….]

Anyways, Dr. Dad is tired of his son lazing about and hands him the flyer that requests a director for a stage production of Hamlet. So, Julian heads over to the theater to see what’s what.  Pretty much from this point on, the movie just got loony. I couldn’t decide if it was stupid or smartly funny or both or what. See? I’m still so undecided on this! Okay, I’ll go on.

At the theater, Julian meets Theo Horace (played by John Ventimiglia) who is the writer of this stag adaptation.  A few words about Theo… He’s a vampire. You can totally tell because, well, he’s a vampire. He even bites a chick in the introduction I didn’t bother to describe for you. He is very pale and emo-ish but minus the eyeliner. He vamps about the place, and keeps popping up behind people throughout scenes in a creepy horror movie manner. Again, it’s silly, but smart.

Julian gets the job and even suggests a friend of his for the role of Hamlet. Immediately, Theo asks the usual job interview questions such as does this friend have any blood viruses or does he participate in any intravenous drug usage. You know, the usual.  Theo also explains that his adaptation of the play will be with vampires, and that it will be called Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Undead.

The role of Hamlet goes to Vince who is played by Kris Lemche who played the recurring character of Hillinger on La Femme Nikita. I absolutely love that show. Okay, back to the movie.

So while all this is going on, we also meet Anna who is Julian’s ex-girlfriend. Anna is now dating some mover/shaker businessman played by none other than Ralph Macchio!!!!! His name is Bobby, and he’s a hot-tempered, nouveau riche type who acts like he’s in the mafia.  Julian seems to still be at Anna’s beck and call, and is terrified of Bobby. He and Vince pretend to be a gay couple whenever Bobby is around. This really has no point, other than it’s just funny. Oh, and Anna gets the role of Ophelia.

Onward to rehearsals! The important role of Rosencrantz is given to Carlo a sort of hispanic valley dude moron. He keeps trying to change lines and character names. For example, he thinks the play should be called Rosenbros and Guildendude.  Guildenstern is played by some guy who reminds me a little of  Jon Lovtiz’s SNL character, “Master Thespian.”  He keeps trying to give direction and do his lines differently.  Acting!!!

Oh…..and Theo has CHANGED the whole play around.  Basically, [deep breath] Horatio is a vampire. He makes Hamlet one too and they are besties from that point on. For kicks, Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are vampires too! But when Horatio tries to turn Ophelia, she declines and kills herself. Enraged, Hamlet tries to kill Horatio, but finds he cannot. He learns that if he is able to drink from the Holy Grail (yes, you read that right) that he can save his soul and maybe defeat Horatio.  So now it’s a race for the Grail.  Did you get all that? Cause that’s the play. It’s also the movie….

As Julian says “This play is really confusing,” and I agree But first, allow me to give you some samples of Theo’s wonderful writing:

[Horatio shoots an arrow. It hits a target]

Hamlet: Well aimed Horatio. Your arrows have outrageous fortune.

[Hamlet shoots arrow and misses]

Hamlet: You may be good with arrows and bows. Myself, I am good with ribbons and bows. Who designed your clothing? That outfit just screams something is rotten in the state of Denmark. Is that a Roman toga? It’s got to-go!” 

Right, so if you recall, Theo is an actual vampire pretending to be a playwright. Here’s the interesting point. Theo is in real life, Horatio, and he’s been feuding with the real Hamlet all these years.  The point of doing the play is to draw Hamlet out into the open. Oh, and every time Theo/Horatio puts on a production of his play, he turns the entire cast into vampires.

We learn all this from a secret society known as Rosencrushens and Goldenstone.  They are also after the Grail, and have been keeping an eye on Hamlet and Horatio through all of time.  Their token employee is master of disguise, Charlotte. She appears all throughout the movie as a homeless person, as a doctor, a man, etc. She’s cool.

So during all these rehearsals, Vince gets bitten by one of Theo’s vampire minions. He’s killed and it takes him a long time to turn. Meanwhile, the minions (while under Theo’s tuterlage) turn the rest of the cast too.  The need for all the vampire turning makes little sense to me and is kind of lame. It also feels like filler.

Here’s whats  not filler: At some point in the movie, a character is killed. There are two detectives investigating the murder, and one of them is Jeremy Sisto.  What’s funny about the first scene with the detectives, is that is was most likely modeled after the gravedigger scene from the actual Hamlet.  Sisto’s detective is having a philosophical discussion with his partner. The scene even ends with Sisto asking for the partner to bring him a beverage–just like the gravedigger requests of his assistant.  Now that’s just smart.

Anywho, that’s all of the plot I’ll go into for this review. I don’t want to spoil the movie in case anyone feels like watching it. I hope you do. It hits on several humor levels, and is just really hard to describe. Some bits of the movie were really fun and well-played, but some of the plot when looking at it as a framework, makes zero sense.  Theo’s play which mimics character exposition is ludicrous.  I think if I watched this movie again, I’d pair it with a viewing of Hamlet 2 which was just as loony but also really enjoyable.

 

Fun Details of Note

The Opening credits to the movie feature drawings of skullheads of the cast. It’s very macabre, kind of humorous and set the perfect tone for the film.   Also, Sean Lennon did the music. It was really waltzy and felt a little Elfmanesque.

Each chapter of the film was introduced with a heading involving the title of a famous play or book. These included:

  •  “Job Interview with a Vampire
  • “As I Lay Undrying”
  • And my absolute favorite “Breakfast is Tiffany”  Hee hee

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!!!!!!

It’s the most wonderful time of the year…

Halloween!!! I love October. I love how the temperature drops, how it gets darker earlier, how the leaves change, etc. I even have a list of movies I work my way through every year in anticipation of the greatest holiday this side of Christmas and St. Patrick’s Day. So for right now, while I work on the next review to present to you good people, here is my list of must-see movies for October.

Oh, and before I get to that list— and yes, I do realize that I killed the moment there—I just wanted to point out that I’m not big into ghosties or slasher films. I don’t like any Japanese horror films either because they truly freak me out. I never got more than ten minutes into The Ring and have no plans to find out what happens in the remainder of that film. As a child, I was completely terrified by Ghostbusters and The Lady in White. After seeing the former, I was convinced Slimer was going to come out of the faucet, and I can’t remember what frightened me about the latter other than it did.

That said, I’m sure my personal list isn’t very festive for some folks, but to each their own. And now, without further ado and in no particular order:

1. It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown. I mean, how on earth could this not be watched at least 2 or 3 times this month? It’s the greatest TV special ever in terms of Halloween.

2. Shaun of the Dead. Funniest zombie movie I’ve ever seen. Bonus points because Bill Nighy is in the movie.

3. Underworld. Sequels aside, this first endeavor in the franchise was a pretty groovy movie. Extra Bill Nighy bonus points.

4. Sleepy Hollow. Tim Burton and Johnny Depp took a favorite story and made it even better. It’s creepy, silly, and cool. Extra points given for Christopher Walken and his pointy teeth.

5. 28 Days Later. They are infected zombie-like people, not zombies. Doesn’t really matter. It’s not the infected you need to be scared of.  Its sequel, 28 Weeks Later, is pretty good too.

6. The Rocky Horror Picture Show. Actually, it’s okay to turn this off right after Tim Curry sings “Sweet Transvestite” because after that, in my opinion, the movie gets dull pretty quickly. Up until that point, however, it’s a blast.

7. Clue. I know it’s not exactly a Halloween movie. But, it is a good murder mystery movie (and a fun board game as well). I watch this one every Halloween.

8. Arsenic and Old Lace. Maybe for the fact that it’s set on Halloween, or that two little old ladies turn out to be innocent-looking serial killers, but this slightly creepy screwball comedy is an annual favorite.

9. Meet Me in St. Louis.  Most people would consider this a Christmas film since the famous “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas” song is in it. But the Halloween section where little Margaret O’Brien’s “Tootie” works herself up to be the most horrible is the best part. Also, it’s a little scary that the children of the neighborhood are building bonfires on the street.

10. Army of Darkness. Why this one? Because it’s a classic. Any of the other movies in the series (Evil Dead; Evil Dead 2) could just as easily sit in the #10 spot, but Army of Darkness is the most fun of the three. From this movie, you know that you “shop smart; shop s-mart.” You know what a boomstick is. You know or maybe think you know the magic words to safely collect the Necronomicon. I could go on for days about the wonderfulness that is Bruce Campbell, but I won’t. If you aren’t sold on Bruce by now, I worry about you.

And for the Meh Movie of the list………………

11.  The Queen of the Damned. I actually saw this movie in the theater. For the most part, the movie is just silly. It’s nothing like the book, and the characters feel more like caricatures than anything else. Still, it’s vampires, and some of the music is okay. I do like one of the music videos Lestat’s band does. It’s in the style of The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari which is a very creepy silent film. If you can’t seen that little gem, you need to go find it.

Shanghai Afternoon

A couple of weeks ago, Shanghai Noon came on TV. I remembering seeing this movie when it was in theaters and greatly enjoying it. So tuning in to see it on the small screen was a no-brainer. I settled in and laughed my butt off as Owen Wilson’s wayward Roy O’Bannion and Jackie Chan’s steadfast Chon Wang bickered, fought, and ultimately teamed up to fight off the bad guys and rescue the kidnapped princess.

It was fun and funny! Wilson manages to combine brilliant and clueless in such a way that it’s hard to tell if Roy is cluelessly brilliant or just brilliantly clueless. Chan (whose stunts in the movie are way cool) manages his fish out of water role just fine. He’s both naive and clever. I know I just said they were both, but it’s true. And together, they work really well with one another. Chon keeps Roy somewhere near the straight and narrow, and Roy helps Chon loosen up a bit.

So that was Shanghai Noon, and that was a couple of weeks ago. Still smiling off of my enjoyable movie viewing, I was pleasantly surprised to see that Noon‘s sequel, Shanghai Knights, was on TV just this past weekend. So of course, I had to watch it.  The thing is…while my favorite duo are a-okay reprising their roles, the movie is kind of crappy. I think part of it is that the filmmakers thought to add in all these historic, literary, and film references. There weren’t too many of these in the first movie at all. Chon’s name was the major joke since Roy tells him that Chon Wang is a “terrible cowboy name!”

In the sequel our heroes team up again—this time in London. The goal is to find Chon’s sister and also recover the stolen Imperial Seal of China. There’s also a dastardly plot to kill Queen Victoria.  Super. I think the movie would have been okay with just that and allow Wilson and Chan to do their comedy thing. Instead, we had lovely historical liberties such as a young Arthur Conan Doyle as a Scotland Yard detective (in real life he was a doctor) who finds inspiration for Sherlock Holmes from Chon and Roy (it’s a running gag through in several scenes.). We are also entertained with a fight scene turned dance number to Singin’ in the Rain and a Keystone Cops gag. Don’t even get me started on young Charlie Chaplin who seems more like the Artful Dodger than anything else.

I don’t know. Maybe I was expecting too much. The good thing is that the characters of Chon and Roy remained the same, fun guys from the first movie. Chon is still a little too serious (though that’s probably a good thing) and Roy keeps winding up in trouble. Alone, they don’t get anywhere. Together, they save the day and make me laugh. I love it.

If memory serves, Shanghai Knights did moderately well at the box office, and I think at one point there was talk of a sequel. It would have been called Shanghai Dawn. I have no idea what it would be been about. I don’t think anyone got much further than “we’ll call it Shanghai Dawn.”  According to Wikipedia, in 2003 there was an interview with Owen Wilson where he assumed the movie would begin in Hollywood (where our heroes were bound at the end of the 2nd movie) and go on Africa maybe.

I like to imagine if it had been made and was also a success, we could have looked forward to what I’m going to title “Shanghai Afternoon.” I suppose this movie would take place with an older Roy and Chon. If Shanghai Dawn took place maybe 3 years after Knights  then the time would be 1890.  So lets set my fantasy sequel sometime during 1900.

If you recall, Roy had invested money in zeppelins. He was convinced it was a good way to go. In 1900, the first zeppelin flight took place in Germany. We’ll put Roy there. Meanwhile, Chon has gone back to being a sheriff somewheres in California maybe. Roy has written to Chon inviting him to the big debut and the two reunite in Germany. And that is where the movie gets crazy. Someone tries to steal the zeppelin, and in trying to save it, Chon and Roy find themselves floating off over the lands of Europe for a few hours that afternoon. While they wait for rescue (or eventual landing/crash) the two catch up and reminisce about the good old days. Voila: Shanghai Afternoon. It would be more of an art-house piece, I think, and wouldn’t make so much as a nickel in box office receipts. 

My other idea is that the two run a small movie theater in an even smaller town and they are both old. Yeah. I didn’t get too far there, did I? Who knows Maybe Chan and Wilson plan to skip right over Shanghai Dawn and focus on a better picture down the road. Maybe they are just patiently biding their time until the time is just right for more Roy and Chon.  If ever that day arrives, I’ll buy a ticket.

**Special Note: I will not, however, buy a ticket for the 3-D IMAX version. That’s insanely expensive! I’m not made of money, you know.**

Worst. Vacation. Ever.

This year’s Nobel Prize for Physics was awarded to two scientists who were (and still are) paving new paths in the world of optical physics. Man, oh man, I wish they had been involved in this week’s movie. I’m not an expert in the world of physics, but the equation just isn’t balancing. Something ain’t right. And for that reason, I’m going to recap this sucker. You know what that means!

SPOILERS-SPOILERS-SPOILERS-SPOILERS-SPOILERS-SPOILERS-SPOILERS-SPOILERS-SPOILERS-SPOILERS-SPOILERS-SPOILERS-SPOILERS-SPOILERS-SPOILERS-SPOILERS-SPOILERS-SPOILERS

Our movie this week is Termination Point which stars 80’s/90’s heart-throbs, Jason Priestley (of 90210 fame) and Lou Diamond Phillips (of Young Guns fame). Both are way older now so they look less like heart-throbs and more like grown up folks who make questionable airline choices. I digress…

The film opens with a scene in which a jet engine crashes through a barn roof. It’s very ill-timed because it totally interrupts the teenagers rounding 2nd base in the hayloft.  Outside, the farmland is littered with debris from what looks like a passenger jet. There’s an emergency door, some charred bodies, and before you can say “Donnie Darko” a singed scrap of paper that turns out to be a boarding pass DATED FOR TOMORROW!!!

The sky turns dark and the clouds open up in a sort of vortex. There are also lightning strikes that act more like Dalek attacks and they cause whatever they touch to vanish. It’s like the sky is screaming “EXTERMINATE!!!”

Cue the opening credits!!! Let me say right here and now that this movie is obviously supposed to be in the science fiction genre, and the filmmakers want emphasis on the science–but not too much! The opening credit segment is in pink. VERY pink…like, um…pink. They are also science-like with images of graphs and charts. There’s also lasers.

Around the time your retinas are burned out, the movie starts back up again. We learn that something called the Alpha String Project (ASP) has gone missing. This immediately throws a variety of covert government/military folks into a tizzy.

Meanwhile at the airport, Jason Priestley boards a plane bound for Mexico City. Priestley plays Caleb Smith: a man on vacation with his family.  Lou Diamond Phillips boards too. He is a scientist named Daniel Winter. He’s over the Alpha String Project and works for STC. We learn Caleb is in security. We never really learn what STC is. I’m not even certain if that’s Caleb’s employer or Winter’s. It’s never very clear, and is just one of many details the movie never fleshes out for us.

If you recall, the  ASP has gone missing. Guess who gets the call? Caleb! He tells his wife and daughter to enjoy their flight, and that he’ll meet up with them via a later flight.  Caleb checks in with his assistant, Allison (who might be at the STC office–I don’t know!!!), and learns that it’s Winter who totally stole the ASP.

Caleb and his security team bust into Winter’s house.  The house is clear, but there are crazy person murals all over the place along with a list of aliases for Winter and pictures of Caleb’s wife and daughter–odd. They also find a crazy person video where Winter explains that he’s doing what he’s doing because he has no choice and so on and so forth. He claims the government wants to militarize the ASP and that would “bring about a catastrophe.”  Allison runs the aliases and one pops up on that flight with Caleb’s family.

Thank you for flying Sky Wing Airlines. We hope you have a pleasant flight. We return to the plane where the seatbelt light has just turned off. Caleb’s daughter (Sarah) stands in the world’s longest airplane bathroom queue. What did these people eat/drink before takeoff? Some skeezy guy flirts with Sarah and he’s just creepy.  Then the air marshal steps in the shuts that down. Ha!

Meanwhile, the pilots are finally alerted to a possible security threat on their plan. They are to standby for a fighter intercept and escort. Great day to go into work!  The Captain announces that they are having a mechanical issue and need to turn the plane around. Winter isn’t buying it. He pulls out some strange gizmo and we get a shot of some crate in the hold.

Back on the ground, Caleb is arguing with his boss, Quinn. Quinn had earlier received word from the President that the flight was expendable. Orders have been given to shoot the plane down. We also learn that the ASP is a teleporter.

Quinn issues the orders to fire on the plane. Meanwhile, Winter uses his Blackberry (cause they can dress it up, but that’s what it is) to activate the teleporter. The fighters shoot the plane.  At this point, Priestley works up some real tears–maybe. Hard to tell. But he appears very upset.

Let me introduce you to Joshua at the STC (???) office.  He has the best job in the whole movie. He gets to tell us what the plan is. He’ll pop up from time to time. I just thought you ought to meet.  Joshua announces that while we all saw the explosion in the sky, the hit was not confirmed. Then we learn that the plane’s transponder is in a debris field (the farm) and Caleb is on his way. Fun fact: the debris field farm is over 100 miles away from where the plane was shot down. You do the math.

Caleb checks out the wreckage on the farm. He finds his daughter’s purse and asks where the bodies are. An agent working the site says the bodies were moved hours ago since the debris was found the day before. But per Caleb the plane just exploded within the last hour or so.  Odd.

Quinn arrives and gets a talking to from Caleb. Quinn says there’s an odd chance that his family is still alive. They go into the situation tent. To review, the ASP is a teleporter and we see footage of a test on a lab rat. It works. Rat is teleported 3 feet. Wow. I’m sold.

We are also lectured on wormholes and null-space. A character I’m naming Young Assistant tells Caleb that they confirmed Winter took the machine and put it on the plane. Quinn’s theory is that Caleb’s family is existing in another dimension.  Everyone totally goes with this theory. There are no questions; there are no naysayers in the field. The plane’s passengers–not all, but some–are still existing but they are outside of space and time for right now. And everyone’s cool with it.

Meanwhile, we cut back to the Schrödinger’s plane. Claire (Caleb’s wife) and Sarah are having a small freak out. The plan is half-empty. They look out the window and it’s all dark and lightning-like. They wonder what happened to the others. A popular theory is that they are all dead and this is what Hell must be like. Also, the pilots are missing, so the plane is sort of flying on its own.

Back on the farm, science equipment detects an atmospheric anomaly.  This is so lame. Helicopters witness the swirling clouds of the vortex. Joshua asks one pilot if he needs to abort. When there’s no reply, Joshua does what everyone in movies on phones do when they don’t get the response they want. He stands up, and then leans forward with his hands on his desk and asks again in a more stern fashion. Like that makes a difference. Vortex lightning takes out the helicopter.

By the way, Joshua and everyone else refer to the vortex as the wormhole, so I will too. New theory. The wormhole that teleported the plane is too large to close, and is getting larger. Cue the disaster music!

We learn that there were two controllers for the machine. One was that Blackberry. The other is missing. It is thought that it’s with Winter’s girlfriend, Jasmine.  Caleb and some guy show up at Jasmine’s place. There are cops inside only they aren’t really. They are hit-men. Caleb shoots one of them dead, but the other gets away.  The nameless partner, however, is killed in the crossfire. Caleb locates Jasmine who is in dire need of medical attention. She is barely alive. but we manage to learn the other controller is in the bank.

Suspicious that there were hit-men at Jasmine’s place, Caleb worries that might be a mole in the organization. He relays this to Allison. Also, there is a new plan. The science folks want to use an EMP on the wormhole in hopes that it will shut it down or something. I’m really confused. I love science, but these folks keep jumping from plan to plan. I think they have no actual plan.

Back on the plane, air security guy and skeezy guy (who might actually also be air security) ask to speak with Dr. Winter. They accuse Winter of stealing sensitive equipment and activating it. Huh? How did they know what was on board? Something doesn’t smell right.

“This plane has been teleported into an alternate dimension.” If you want to read that sentence again you can. Cause that’s totally what Winter explains to the folks left on the plane. Folks who were seated nearest to the teleporter get to hear this explanation, because those who were not as near are now dead. Oh, and also, the wormhole is once again referred to as “vortex.” I wish people would make up their minds! AND, if the plane gets pulled into the vortex, they will be crushed to death. Awesome.

By now you might be saying, “well, let’s just teleport out of there and go home! Maybe Everybody Loves Raymond is on somewheres.” Ah, but you see, the power cells are damaged in the device, so now it’s fixing time. Sarah is the smallest so she gets to be the one to climb down into the hold and open the crate. Winter drops the handy info that the power cells are very unstable and could she refrain from jostling them too much. Otherwise, ka-boom.  I

We also learn that air security guy and skeezy guy are evil henchmen hired to steal the ASP from Winter who literally just stole it from his workplace. I just want to make sure you are following.

On the ground, a pulse bomb has been sent into the wormhole but it does NOTHING except make the magnetic field stronger. Oops. Also, some character has now deduced that the vortex could destroy the plane. How they know that the plane is on a collision course with the vortex is anyone’s guess.

Caleb requests clearance to get into the bank vault of the now destroyed town of Eastboro. Just one scene earlier, the crazy vortex lightning took out everything in it’s path except for the bank. Very convenient.  Caleb and the bank manager work to find the correct safe deposit box, but when they open it, it’s empty. Also, the fake cop hit-man from earlier shows back up to shoot up the place. Now Caleb is sure there’s a mole, but who??

We learn that the vortex is still growing. At this rate, it will keep growing until infinity, and then the entire universe will cease to exist. Bummer.

Stupid, well-meaning Allison tells Young Assistant guy that there might be a leak in the office’s security. Young guy tells her that Quinn is the leak which is pointless, because as soon as he and Allison walk out in to the hall, he kills her. So I guess he’s Evil Young Assistant guy now.

Back on the plane, fake air marshal and skeezy boy manage to shoot the flight attendant. The resulting scuffle causes Winter to drop his Blackberry and break it. So even though the teleport has been repaired and refueled, there’s no way to operate it. Oh, and that vortex is getting closer.

At this point, fake air marshal and skeezy boy are holding everyone captive.  Since they are getting closer to the vortex, I guess time is out of joint or something. Ghostly images of two hours ago start appearing. So for example, that recently deceased flight attendant has shown back up as a ghost in First Class.

Regular Movie rule: The vehicle in which our hero drives can outrun any natural disaster. As Caleb drives all willy-nilly around the destroyed area, he has a brainstorm. He has a flashback to his daughter saving up for their vacation and realizes that the bank dying Jasmine spoke of, was a piggy bank in her room.  While collecting the controller from Jasmine’s house Caleb gets to go through another shootout–this time with Evil Young Assistant guy. This time the vortex joins in and kills the evil assistant dude.

Joshua the all-knowing believes that they can erase a timeline. This is like the third new plan he’s come up with. They’ll open a wormhole (that’s right! They are calling it “wormhole” again) on the plane with the 2nd controller, and somehow that makes things better.

Back on the plane. A small wormhole appears in the bathroom. It’s Caleb to the rescue. He unties his wife and has her untie the other passengers. Skeezy goes to check out the noise.  Caleb attacks and knocks him out. Fake air marshal shoots Caleb’s wife.  At this point, the vortex lightning now gets into the plane and takes out a side of it. Skeezy gets zapped. Good riddance. Then Caleb utters “have a safe flight” to fake air marshal and kicks him off the plane.

Okay, here’s what happens next that really burns my biscuits. Caleb sends himself a text message explaining how Evil Young Assistant is evil, and that Winter will be stealing the device. Um…it’s a teleporter, not a time machine. This makes no nevermind since they manage to teleport back to their original timeline just as the plane enters the vortex/wormhole.

So, let me get this straight. Caleb sends a text from a timeline that will cease to exist once the teleporter activates and sends them back to where they started which means that he was never able to do all he did in world saving and good-deed doing and shooting because he never needed to since it never happened! [deep breath].

This obviously doesn’t matter, because as we witness Caleb and family board their flight, Caleb gets that text of all that is to come. He’s able to stop Winter, and we see Evil Young Assistant guy get arrested by Quinn.  Also, Allison is still alive. Since Caleb has somehow averted imminent doom, he and his family get to go to Mexico City on the company jet. Hooray!!!

Yeah, so that’s Termination Point. It was an exciting movie to watch. The twists and turns with events were paced well so the movie never slowed down too much. But there was obviously a lot of crazy. I found myself going “huh?” many, many times while watching the movie.  Is the movie worth checking out? I suppose if you have nothing else to do, then go for it. But consider yourself warned. There is no ASP device to teleport back to before you made that movie-watching decision, and as far as I can tell, there’s no way to text yourself from the future. Good luck!

 

The Inevitable

I knew this would happen eventually. At the very beginning of this project—in the very first post—I said I would publish new entries on a weekly basis. Otherwise, I would get out of habit and the blog would devolve into the stereotypical blog that starts of with post aplenty followed by weeks then months of nothing.

But you know…life happens and it’s not always easy to find the time to work on a review or think out a current topic upon which to discuss. Anyhoo…I’ve really been enjoying working on this blog, and I hope that you few readers o’mine are enjoying it too.

So here’s my new rule. If I miss a week of posting a new entry, then the following week must have a make-up post. I think that’s doable.  That said…this week, I shall endeavor to entertain you with two blog posts. We will have that review I’ve been promising you as well as a general look back upon a short film franchise that I kind of enjoyed. Not a “meh” franchise really, but fun to discuss and think about.

This post, obviously, doesn’t count. So…it’s sort of like you are getting 3 posts for the price of 1. Kind of. Except this is all free. Yeah.